May 2003 Archives
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senorjosh.comMay 2003
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music of my mind (short story)
May 30, 2003
Sailing in seizures of laughter, crawling out from under the heel of love, tearing down a dirt road away from Salvador, the bus shakes and I can't sleep. I'm exhausted, just want to drift away, but as my head bounces against the window all I can think is Paul Simon. Paul Simon, Stevie Wonder, Al Green, they fill my aches with words and sighs with song. Here, on the bus, the lyrics seem out of place. But so am I, and why censor? Paul was right: some stories are magical, meant to be sung. This is what filled my head then and now; this is the story of how I begin to remember...
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Posted by senorjosh at 01:12 AM | Comments (1)
two incredible brazilian albums
May 10, 2003
If you know me at all, you know I'm a little obsessed with brazilian music. There are two recently-released albums that justify this obsession. Both are somewhat unusual, coming from the 'new wave' of brazilian music. In other words, it's not samba or bossa nova, and it's not Marisa Monte or MPB.

The first is the self-titled album by Naçao Zumbi, released on Trama Records. This group, originally run by Chico Science, released a few albums that were more or less emblematic of the Mengue Beat music of northeastern Brazil (history of the band). The music was very hard, with a large and loud percussion section and alternating rap and rock on top. The rhythms were raw and heavy, and some people really liked the Chico Science stuff. However, the new release on Trama is much tamer, and I like it a lot more. The rhythms are still creative and deep, but the vocals and other instruments work together much better on this album. The album is cohesive and strong, with plenty of funky beats. Best of all, it was released in the states. UOL has a review, with snippets of the songs available for download, here; there's also some info on the Trama/Zumbi collaboration here.

The second album, also on trama records, is orchestra klaxon, by max de castro. Apparently it's his second album, though I never heard the first. orchestra klaxon sounds like a semi-electronic version of Djavan, though less cheesy and less polished. De Castro came into the scene as a DJ and arranger, but his melodies are good and catchy. The only review I've been able to find is in Portuguese and fairly bland, located here. They called the album samba-jazz electronica. I guess that works. Check out the second and fourth tracks.
Posted by senorjosh at 05:38 PM | Comments (2)
jack handey
The wise man can pick up a grain of sand and envision a whole universe. But the stupid man will just lie down on some seaweed and roll around until he's completely draped in it. Then he'll stand up and go, "Hey, I'm Vine Man."

Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room, talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books.

If God dwells inside us, like some people say, I sure hope He likes enchiladas, because that's what He's getting!

Children need encouragement. So if a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way, he develops a good, lucky feeling.

One day one of my little nephews came up to me and asked me if the equator was a real line that went around the Earth, or just an imaginary one. I had to laugh. Laugh and laugh. Because I didn't know, and I thought that maybe by laughing he would forget what he asked me.

I don't pretend to have all the answers. I don't pretend to even know what the questions are. Hey, where am I?

When you go ice-skating, try not to swing your arms too much, because that really annoys me.

Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus's-flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.

Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I spin around and pin the guy's arm behind his back. NOW who's asking the questions?

Why do people in ship mutinies always ask for "better treatment"? I'd ask for a pinball machine, because with all that rocking back and forth you'd probably be able to get a lot of free games.

If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.

It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I guess that's what I like about it. It's easy. Just sitting there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money.

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

Instead of putting a quarter under a kid's pillow, how about a pinecone? That way, he learns that "wishing" isn't going to save our national forests.

At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money on tooth X-rays. But then I thought, if a patient said, "How's my back tooth?" and you just looked at it with your X-ray vision and said, "Oh it's okay," then the patient would probably say, "Aren't you going to take an X-ray, stupid?" and you'd say, "Aw fuck you, get outta here," and then he probably wouldn't even pay his bill.

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.

I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran up and lit the evil puppet villain on fire. No, I didn't. Just kidding. I just said that to illustrate one of the human emotions, which is freaking out. Another emotion is greed, as when someone kills someone for money, or something like that. Another emotion is generosity, as when you pay someone double what he paid for his stupid puppet.

I remember one day I was at Grandpa's farm and I asked him about sex. He sort of smiled and said, "Maybe instead of telling you what sex is, why don't we go out to the horse pasture and I'll show you." So we did, and there on the ground were my parents having sex.

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.


Continue reading "jack handey"

Posted by senorjosh at 01:58 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)
Iguaçu Falls (short story)
May 5, 2003
The thunderous waterfalls drown memories of Carnaval, of Amazon bugs, of triumphs and trifles. Mountains of water collapse from three countries into an airborne ocean of mist, drenching the rare mix of jungle and civilization for miles around. Little black swifts fly into the cataracts to their nests behind, as sweaty tourists slip on saturated walkways. This place is Iguaçu, the great water of the Guarani, the devil’s throat, the natural wonder of the world, the end of the road for conquerors of old.
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Posted by senorjosh at 05:24 PM | Comments (0)
website complete
May 2, 2003
I've finally taken down the large "under construction" signs from each of these pages, so in a sense, the website is now complete. It'll still probably change a lot over the next few weeks, but the framework is safely in place. I also (finally) figured out how to let people leave feedback and comments, which can now be done by clicking on the "comment" link at the bottom of each message. This was done with the opensource dotcomments, which was probably more pain than it was worth (though you could prove me wrong and leave a message). For those interested, the weblog (on this page and in the projects section) is done using blogger, hosted by webstrike. If you need someone to host your website, webstrike is inexpensive and reliable). The picture with the rocks is courtesy of tom sullivan; I took the rest of the pictures in salvador around Carnaval time in 2001.
Posted by senorjosh at 07:20 PM | Comments (5)


 
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